A court has issued a pioneer sentence to impose on a parent shared custody of their children against their will, given the impossibility of the mother to take care of them alone due to the disability of one of the minors.
Until then, joint custody had always been seen as a right of the father to be able to enjoy his children with the same assiduity and involvement as the mother. However, this sentence reflects that it is not just a right but a duty to be assumed by the other parent.
The mother was overwhelmed
According to the Diario de Córdoba, when the divorce of the couple was processed custody of the two children was granted to the mother. But with the entry into adolescence (currently children are 14 and 16 years old), the disability suffered by one of the children has been aggravated, and the woman has asked for help before exhaustion that meant the special attention and constant dedication that his son needed.
"In addition to the dedication and permanent care of the children, she had to attend to her labor obligations, which was almost impossible, since she was joined by the loss of her parents' support to help her take care of the grandchildren, because of an unfortunate disease "- explains the vice president of the Spanish Association of Family Lawyers (Aeafa), one of whose lawyers has represented women.
So the mother asked her ex-partner for help asking for joint custody, but the father refused. Initially, the Court of First Instance handed down a sentence in which maternal custody was maintained and the father was forced to increase his son's pension by 75 euros.
But for this mother it was not an economic issue but a greater involvement and help, so finally, it was the Provincial Court of Cordoba who imposed on the parent shared custody for alternate weeks, Against his will.
It's the first time something like this happens
Is the first time a sentence imposes shared custody against a parent against his will, and for the Aeafa it is undoubtedly a great step forward, since in this particular case the mother faced a family problem whose duty has to fall on both parents equally.
Until now, the courts understood that if the father refused to take care of his children, he could hardly be forced to do so, and this was seen in two similar sentences of the Court of Valencia and a court in Madrid.
In both cases, the mothers requested greater involvement of their ex-partners for the care of their sick and autistic children, respectively, but the courts did not impose on the parents the joint custody claimed by the women.
Shared custody, duty or obligation?
The truth is that a few years ago it was rare to find parents who requested joint custody of their children when they divorced, but in recent years more and more men who dare to ask for it. According to the latest data published by the INE, joint custody is currently granted in 28.3% of the ruptures, and 66.2% is granted to the mother.
There is no doubt that in divorce cases where parents resolve their differences in a civilized manner, and there is love and dedication to children on both sides, shared custody is best for the child, as it allows both parents to enjoy equally.
The Supreme Court itself in 2011 ordered that "does not allow us to conclude that it is an exceptional measure, but rather, should be considered the most normal, because it allows the right that children have to relate to both parents to be effective, even in crisis situations, whenever this is possible and as long as it is ".
In addition, shared custody is not only beneficial for children, but also for their parents who refuse to be simple "visitors" of their children, who want to live with them, Get involved in your education and upbringing and share your day to day.
However, in cases like this, we are sure that we all have the following reflection: what happens when a father refuses to be equally involved in raising their children? Should he be forced to do so?
We have already seen on some occasion how women's associations have demonstrated against the shared custody imposed, and consider that if the father does not want to exercise as such he cannot be forced since this would affect the welfare of the children in common.
And it is that personally, I find it terribly hard for a father to refuse joint custody and a court to force him through a sentence. Because I wonder: What kind of care and attention can someone give against their will?
However, we cannot forget the mother, and I cannot imagine how difficult it must have been for her to have to resort to justice to ask for greater involvement of the father of his children. Parenting alone must be hard, and I suppose it will be much more when children have some kind of illness or disability: is it fair for a mother to have to deal with it alone?
No doubt this sentence will give a lot to talk about and generate all kinds of opinions but, as in all cases of divorce, I can only think of the children involved, and what your physical and emotional well-being should always be the most important.
Daily Way of Cordoba
In Babies and More We divorce: how and when we tell children according to their age, The photo that shows how beautiful shared custody can be between two families assembled, When shared custody is unfeasible due to the distance between homes of parents, shared custody as a preferred modality in Spain, is it the best for children? In our family neither mom nor dad is just a spectator: the upbringing is of both
